Gay Stories
Jacob, 18 years
I first realised that I liked other boys when I was about 12, but I didn't come out to my parents until much later.
I felt that I wasn't sure enough in myself to tell someone. When I came out, I told everyone at once, I posted a blog
on myspace telling everyone that I was gay, then wrote a letter to my mother. I don't think I would have come out
without the support of an on-line friend, who was around the same age. He helped me to come to terms with my
sexuality and grow my confidence to the level in which I felt sure enough to tell my friends and family. When
I did tell them their first reaction was wary. They always assured me that it didn't matter to them if I was gay,
and that they just wanted me to be happy. Now my mother and I are both very good about it. The only thing to which
she is opposed is when I have outbursts of the 'overtly camp' that dwells within us all. If you want to see my
mum's side of the story it's under the support for parents' section.
Boyd, 19 years
I have a boyfriend called joe who I met at GALYIC, I used to be part of an athletics group but had to quit
because of an injury. I came out at 11 to my friends, 15 to my mum. My mum kept asking me everyday for two years
so I just said yes. My mum is ok with me being gay, shes always been there for me when I'm feeling down and helped
me out. I have suffered homophobia, being beaten up etc, and I reported it to the police, they supported me in moving
to a different area. I lost most of my friends, but after coming out I have made plenty of new ones who accept me for
being me. Being gay has it fantastic times and its not so fantastic times. GALYIC has supported me and helped me become more confident. Ive become involved in projects through and for GALYIC including website, residentials, radio programmes.
Joe, 20 years
I like to chill out to music such as mariah carey and janet jackson, and i do martial arts. i date boyd who i
met at GALYIC youth group. I came out at 17 to friends 18 to my parents. I wanted people to know who i was,
because i felt like i was living a bit of a lie. One of my mates outed me to other friends, which didnt go
down too good. The friends i told myself accepted it and were cool with it. my family said im still the same person.
I found GALYIC great for finding new friends safely. I helped create the new GALYIC website. The residential i went
on helped me conquer my fears.
Gareth, 21 years
im into music, and love hanging with my mates. i came out at 14 to my mates and some of
my family, and at 19 to my parents. i've been denying it for years, but my auntie pursuaded me to
come out but it feels like a weigh off my shoulders and now im glad i did. they can either like me or not. my mum
took it bad, the family didn't like it but they said they'd come round. my friends were ok with it, some of them
even turned out to be gay as well! coming out has made me have more friends. i had to tell my dad again recently,
due to him losing his memory as a result of an accident. he had a very negative response and said he would
'knock it out of me' but is gradually coming around as his health improves. if it wasn't for GALYIC I wouldn't be
who I am today.
Nick, 19 years
i came out to my friends at 15, came to group when i was 16, came out to my parents just after. i didnt see why i
should have kept it secret. The reaction was good. my friend was awesome! i told my mum when i was 14/15 she said
it was a phase, but shes come round since i rang my dad up while they were on holiday and told him and he asked if
he should tell my mum and sister. coming out is hard enough as it is dont do it on your own! GALYIC is a great help.
Harry, 22 years
When I was 11 I realised I was different to the other boys at school. All my friends were girls and I found it
hard to make boy mates. I am out and proud. I came out to my mum when I was 18, my mum told the rest of the family
who reacted really well and are supportive about it. They knew I was gay before I told them (ha ha, I must have given
them clues). Anyway, have a super duper fabulous day because I know I will. Much love, Harry. Xxx
Candy, 22 years
I came out to my friend when I was between 16 and 19. We never actually said it, we just both knew; it was normal
for us. Me and my best friend both realised we liked men between 11 and 13 and we talked about it. All the other
friends I've told are white. None of my Asian friends know. They've asked me but I can't say because I'm afraid of
their rejection. I don't think I could ever tell them. GALYIC is very special to me because I never knew there were
out people in Calderdale. I thought I was just different and odd. GALYIC helped me with my confidence and self-belief
and I'm glad I made that first step and I've never looked back.
Adam, 16 years
I came out when I was 15 years old. The funny thing is I don't remember who I came out to first. But I remember the
reaction: "It's just a phase." And that shocked me because I thought to myself, "No, this is who I am." Then I told
my cousin, who I am not close to, but he was understanding, probably because he is like me. Then I went and told my
best mate but I knew she was lesbian and she welcomed me with hugs. Since coming to GALYIC I have met people who are
like me and are going through the same things as me.
Cobi, 16 years
I have always known I was different because I had more girlfriends than boyfriends. People used to think I'd get a girlfriend easier because I had a lot more girl mates. In Year 7 I used to text this girl and she texted me and I never realised she was flirting with me. I kind of had the idea I was a little bit gay but I just thought, "you can't be you’re at high school!" So I forced myself to go out with her. We never kissed, held hands or chatted. After a week it was over, so I didn't have a relationship with someone till year 9. I thought I'd make myself straight ... but this never happened, it only lasted 2 days. I remember looking in the mirror and saying to myself, "You're gay, get over it!"
But what about my school friends, my Mum and Dad? My friends had always questioned me about it and I just denied it. Then in front of my closest friends at the time I 'pretended' to be gay and when they asked me, "Are you really gay?" I would say, "No I’m joking." But then I remember being on a bus and my friend asked me again. I just said, "Yes!" and she just kept hugging me with delight.
I told five of my friends but then stopped talking to them and I changed my friendship group. I came out to my new friends there and then and they just accepted it. I said, "If you don't like the fact I’m gay just don't bother talking to me." However, one friend was brought up in a homophobic family. He didn't really like it at first then we played spin the bottle and things got exiting because he spun the bottle and it landed on me. He was like, "NO, no, no." I said, "I don't love you if you kiss me, I will just kiss you it's like you kissing another girl." Anyway, we kissed and after that he became fine with it all and he even jokes with me about it now.
My Mum found out I was gay because she kept asking me. Eventually I told her and kept repeating it until I got out
of the car, which was for a few seconds. Then I texted her saying I didn't want any chats to try and change me.
All that had changed about me was my sexual preference. It was easier to come out to my Mum because I had a gay
uncle and my Mum always liked LGBT people. I always talk to my uncle a lot more because he's gay. He’s my dad’s
brother. I haven’t told my dad yet.